So Martin Luther King Jr. Took A Bullet For This?

No seriously, I have no fucking words other than I miss BET UnCut at 2am; but not so much the preacherman who came on at 3am when it went off the air. All jokes aside, it's kinda hard for me to go in on the following video when "Rump Shaker" was once my shit at a party. Not to mention I never missed an opportunity to yell "Doody Brown," or, "Heyyyy, we want some pussy," when I was in college getting drunk and hoping that some slightly inebriated co-ed would have sex with me. I'm pretty sure you too had your share debauchery to the tunes the young people love and enjoy, no? C'mon, I know I'm not alone.

BET and its Deal with the Devil

by Eco.Soul.Intellectual


Have you noticed the plethora of shitty awards shows lately? Let's take MTV, the Oscars, the Espy, the annual porn awards (uhh maybe not that), and we can go down the list.

But the one that I'm going in on today is my all time favorite failure, BET's annual F-list celebs, cooch fest and fake-thug fuckery known as the BET Awards.

Between the BET Awards, Soul Train Music Awards and the Brandy/Ray J reality show, I shake my head and think, "What a waste of airtime space."

You know what is scarier, the fact that there aren't any shows starring black folk on television. And I am not talking about "Tiny & Toya" or any Reality TV series, that is just a cheap way for networks to deal with heavy financial losses in the era of Internet while they figure out the next gigantic exploitative financial scheme other than overpriced advertising.

With that said, some people view BET as the only time to watch diversity other than the token black, Latino, or Asian that appears on CSI, House or Grey's Anatomy. Yes, please be afraid.

What has been even more of a squander is BET the network, also known to me as Bullshit Entertainment TV. The only shows carrying that half-ass cable channel are "106 & Park" and the Sunday gospel shows that feature pastors with 1983 gherri curls and thousand dollar suits sweating and preaching religious feel-good lies to half of a congregation living in upper-class poverty.

And my all-time unfavorite, "106 & Park" is a prime environment and training site for pedophiles. You have two hosts in their mid-to-late 30s, playing videos of soon-be-grandfathers such as P-Diddy who is making like his 10th comeback, in crowd full of tweens and hot-booty adolescents who are ready to pop, lock and drop it for the first star to blow them a kiss.

All you need is a fake east-coast accent like Rocsi (from NOLA) and Terrence (from N. Carolina), a little music, some brand named clothes, and you have at least three teens on your team.

And if I pass by that station and see the film Diary of a Mad Black Woman, a horribly-written homo-erotic Christian-zealous stage play one more time I'm going to come out of my skin. And if there is another Baby Boy replay, I think me and my mama will get pregnant by Jodie or get ripped from asshole to vagina by one of Ving Rhames' jump-fucking scenes.

With the ongoing financial depression, it has been shown through government documents that the overexpsure of highly-hyped, low-production shows and professional athletics such as FIFA, NBA Finals, Wimbeldon, French Open, the Golf Master's, and the list of other sports, is often used to quell the savage beast of the masses. Check out the baseball frenzy on the radio during the 1920s Depression.

T-Pain endorses Sean Hannity and Conservatives in 2010? Can T-Pain even spell Conservative??

Just when you thought T-Pain couldn't reach new heights of niggerdom from the days of his "big ass chain", and that crappy mosquito in your ear sounding music. In steps Sean Hannity into his life to motivate his most coontastic behavior to date:



Look, I wasn't gonna even blog this shit all due to the fact that both of these guys make my ass itch. But then my man Jay Smooth, of Ill Doctrine fame, dropped his two cents and said what I wanted to say a lot nicer than I would. You can check out what Jay has to say in the following video.

I have only one thing to add, and here it is: Is it me, or does the unusual pairing of T-Pain and Sean Hannity in that video look like one of those ventriloquist dummy acts? No seriously, didn't it look like Hannity had his hands up T-Pains ass the whole time? I dunno, but maybe that's how all that auto-tune crap got started? Sorry, I didn't mean any disrespect to the late Roger Troutman or any of his fans, but it's just a thought...

Revenge of the Crackbaby

Remember back in the 80s when crack exploded? Wasn't that devastating to our communities? Well, remember when back then there was much talk about all these babies being born addicted to crack cocaine? Umm, err, where are all of these babies today? Seriously, that's a question that ha been on my mind for quite some time. Whatever happened to these crack babies and what are they doing with themselves these days.

Can any of you clue me in on that one?

I mean I really would like to know because I'd hate to continue believing that they've all been employed by BET (Blaxploitation Everyday Television). Speaking of which, checkout a now famous ex-crackhead who happens to be employed by a certain network at a recent red carpet affair hosted by said network:

Now look, the last thing I'd like to do is make fun of the personal triumph of an individual unless his name is R. Kelly. And yes, R&B sensation Keyshia Cole's mother Frankie is an ex-crackhead who makes it hard to believe that she actually is a recovering addict. But I have to wonder how in the hell was she able to wear platinum gold fronts in her mouth when she doesn't have any teeth? No seriously, when did they start making platinum dentures? This is disturbing folks, and I hope it doesn't become a trend. Lord forbid if someone at Viacom gets the bright idea to give Frankie and Flava Flav a new reality show... together.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad that she's able to bounce back as many recovering addicts have; and I see her emotional meltdown on the red carpet as evidence of just how much she is aware of her blessings. Yes, it's very unlikely for a recovering addict to walk out of prison to become a mainstream star on television with her own show. But am I wrong to see her as being the victim of exploitation by the corporate executives at BET similar to the drug dealers with whom she had dealings?

Surely there is a symbiotic relationship...

But is it right?

You tell me...

This just in from the "This N*ggas Crazy" files: "White folks not gon' take it no mo'!!"

Listen, I don't know if you people actually watch videos posted on blogs. I suspect that some of you value your time and as a result you would rather read than to watch a video. Listen, I spent 10 minutes of my precious life watching the following video by Pastor David Manning. No, my life isn't any better for it, but dammit I had a good laugh, and maybe I'll live longer because of it. Not one to keep a good joke to myself, today I offer you the stultifying performance of this years leading nominee of my annual "Coon Award".

Pastor David Manning Ladies and Gentlemen:

Did you find this as funny as I did? No seriously, I laughed my ass off at this guy. And why? Because obviously this Negro is scared. Can you picture him in the days of slavery? Shit, forget the days of slavery, this clown probably still picks cotton for free every Wednesday just before prayer meeting. No this fool didn't say, that there are White militant groups forming right now and he's praying for their success; and, that he hopes they let him join them. I dunno, I haven't been to church in a long time, but if this guy was here in Memphis I'd go every Sunday. Yes, this is the type of sermon I can appreciate; shit like this makes me laugh; and for that, there'd a be a good tip thrown into the collection plate every week. I'm sorry, but Dave Chappelle's "Black White Supremacist" skit has just been officially murdered by this man. Yes, "Clayton Bigsby" ain't got shit on Pastor Manning.

WHITE POWDER!!

This is the Money You Could Be Saving by Not Watching BET - Death to the Big Ass Chain

"I know we facing a recession, but the music y'all making gon' make it a depression" - Jay Z (Death of Autotune)

OK look, I'm a loyalist kinda guy and writing this is hard for me. I grew up watching BET just like pretty much anybody in my age group and slightly older. To be honest, BET was a mainstay in the homes of Black America much like those Jesus and Martin Luther King Jr. pictures on your grandmother's wall. But oh how times have changed. Gone are the days when Donnie Simpson graced our eyes and gave us a greater appreciation for music by giving us an insight into the lives of artists both young and old. And what do we have today?

Yeah, in the pic above is that pain in the ass Negro who calls himself T-Pain. To me, it's images such as this one which is indicative of where we are culturally as far as BET is concerned. Yes, BET has become the network that is all about the big ass chain and nothing else. I hate to jump on the bandwagon and bash probably the only outlet for Black folks on television. But f*ck it, it's not actually Black owned anymore now is it? Yup, and to me that says a lot considering that it once was.

I was watching the BET Awards last night with much anticipation as was everybody else in America. Before last night I had no idea that the BET Awards were even coming on. Shit, it was probably 50-11 months since I even watched BET to be honest. But with the recent passing of Michael Jackson this award show was hyped to be the best ever as well as a tribute to one of the greats in our culture. So with great anticipation I tuned in to the show.

Lemme tell you: the show was a huge disappointment. I thought I was the only one who felt that way. I thought maybe I was being too hard on them but then I logged onto Twitter when the show was over. It was then that I discovered that I was not alone. Oh yeah, every Black person was on Twitter last night as well; hell they even scared the white folks. As a matter of fact as I watched the show I couldn't help but to think of that Rick James line in that now famous Chappelle Show skit: "The never shoulda gave you n*ggas money!"

Listen here BET, I realized that you guys had little time to switch gears and make the show about Michael Jackson hence the lame tribute attempt. But I have to wonder: what if Michael Jackson didn't die? Had he not, would as many people be tuned in last night to your show? Probably not. Which is why your show was a disappointment for people like me. We tuned in as fans of music and Michael Jackson just knowing you guys were gonna represent to the fullest.

I'm sorry, you guys tried but came up short. There were a few good moments and testimonials. Yup, and as much as I cannot stand Jamie Foxx, I must admit he did a good job as the host. My only complaint about Jamie was them throwing those tight ass high-water jeans. I swear if he farted we would have seen a wardrobe malfunction nothing like Janet Jackson at the Superbowl.

I don't know about you, but I can't help but to think that Don Cornelius is still standing at the podium talking about the O'Jays or lord knows what else. If he is, I ain't mad at the brother; we haven't heard from old Don in a long ass time. Who we should never hear from again is Aaron Hall and Guy. What, did they get the call to appear 30 minutes before the show? They sucked and they looked old. Which is too bad because the O'Jays have been performing for 50yrs and they haven't missed a beat.

But between T-Pain's big ass chain, Soulja Boy, and that Canadian kid Drake with his fake ass retarded down south accent sitting on a stool surrounded by little girls performing a song which is titled " I Wanna F*ck Every Girl In the World" you folks at BET failed horribly. Sure we're gonna remember Ne-yo's MJ renditions, and Janet Jackson's surprise appearance at the end. But once again, I think they did Michael Jackson's family a disservice by labeling this a tribute because it damn sure wasn't. To me, it was all about the big ass chain and coonery we have come to expect from BET in recent years.

Supposedly they're launching a new network for us older folks; lets see how that turns out. At the end of the day BET is not the source of all of the problems or social ills currently plaguing the Black community. As a matter of fact, they have done their share as far as community activism and raising awareness to correct some of these problems which is a good thing. I think we should all remember that in being critical of them as we have. But dammit I'd be lying if I said that the network has done it's fair share to reinforce the big ass chain stereotype, and bullshit music. Hell, I wish BET died and Michael Jackson did a tribute to them.

Maybe BET will Pay attention to Jay-Z...