Aretha Franklin, Aretha Franklin, Aretha Franklin lemme rock ya Aretha Franklin that's all I wanna do Aretha Franklinnnn!

Every time I read, hear, or see the name Lady Gaga I think of fellatio, but when I see her I think of puke. Yep, and then there was this mess. What the fuck is wrong with Aretha Franklin? I mean I know it gets cold in the city of Detroit, but that's not exactly the reason to leave your house looking like a cross be tween the lion from The Wiz and Chewbacca. Seriously Aretha, this shit has to stop, and stop right now.

I could be wrong, but when someone is the queen of soul, I'd like to think they take more care as to how they present themselves when in the spotlight. I dunno, things in Detroit are tough economically and people are in need of money and all. But did you really have to hire Stevie Wonder to pick out your wardrobe?

Have you seen Stevie's hairline lately Aretha?!

Aretha, you're Black royalty, and especially since Michael Jackson is now dead and gone, I'm gonna need you to take this Queen shit more seriously. Earlier this year when you wore that big-ass ugly green puke colored hat at the presidential inauguration and people roasted you I figured you'd get the hint. But what did you do for an encore Aretha? You show up at the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree Lighting looking like a grizzly bear pissed off because someone woke him up from hibernation too early.

Lemme guess, PETA offered to save your house from foreclosure last year if you would stop wearing fur, and you're mad that they put you, your highness, on blast, right? I understand, I wouldn't want people to know that I'm broke or having financial troubles either. Yep, fuck PETA! I hate them skinny salad eating vegetarian fuckers Aretha. They should have gave you the money on the low and not put you out there like that.

But one question: weren't your titties cold in that Manhattan air? Surely your head, face and ass wasn't with all that dead rabbit covering it, but what about the titties Aretha? Yeah, I know them things are huge and you love putting them out there like that; and trust me, I like them. But damn, you're like 84yrs old Aretha! Your titties could have caught pneumonia, or worse, the Swine Flu. I'm just sayin'... in the summer time that's cool if you wanna come out in a tank-top from Forever 21 as you're known to do, but, er, um, in the dead of winter Aretha?

Look, I'm gonna stop for now because the last thing I wanna do is not R-E-S-P-E-C-T the queen. But I'd be damned if her face in the pic above doesn't look like the head of a penis poking out from under the extra uncircumcised foreskin of some Negroes dick....[pause].... um, definitely not a good look there your majesty.

Day of Blogging For Justice: Stop Taser Torture (2009)

Today, just like last year, there are bloggers all over the world dedicated to posting today to raise awareness to an issue that is overlooked: taser torture. In this virtual medium it's great that we can come together to raise awareness to what I consider to be government sanctioned murder. There are blogs out there who chronicle countless daily news stories which involves a loss of life at the hands of police officers by the use of tasers; a supposed non-lethal weapon employed by police departments here in the United States and abroad.

The one incident I'd like to focus on today to highlight this problem, involves the gentleman pictured at the beginning of this post - Oscar Grant. You do remember him, don't you? Sure, I know not very many people are talking about him these days and he may be a distant memory for some. But just to remind you, he was the young man killed by a police officer at a train station in Oakland California. Yeah, his murder was caught on tape and spread across the internet like wild fire. Remember him now? Uh-huh, it happened last New Year's Eve; yes, it has almost been a year - hard to believe, right?

Well I read recently that the trial of the officer in question, Johannes Mehserle, has been moved to Los Angeles for fear of the threats of violence, and the pre-trial publicity of the case. If you remember, there were riots out in Oakland for a day or so after the incident where Grant was killed by said officer. OK, so I know you're wondering what the hell does this have to do with taser torture, right? I mean surely Oscar Grant didn't die because several thousand volts of electricity was purposely sent through his body by a police officer, no? Well, the accused police officer, in his defense, is alleging that he was reaching for his taser and accidentally drew his gun; a defense that is plausible I might add, although some may not agree.

You see, with taser being considered as a "non-lethal" weapon, it was easy for this officer to consider using this in a manner so as to gain control of a situation. Never mind the fact that there have been at least 50 taser related deaths this year at the hands of police officers here in America alone; 21 of the victims were African American males But, none of this is important, because, well, tasers are non-lethal. And guess what? Oscar Grant isn't even mentioned as one of these victims, but indirectly he is.

Had the police officer actually used his taser on Oscar Grant, there's a chance he may be be alive today as opposed to being shot at point blank range with a service revolver which was mistaken for a taser. Maybe Grant may have been luckier than the 450 people who have died from taser use in North America  by police to date. Maybe if tasers were seen as a lethal weapon more caution would be taken in applying them to civilians?

The real question is: how much longer will we allow taser use by the police to continue at the rate that it has, all the while being responsible for the loss of lives before something is done? Do we need more Oscar Grant-like cases before this becomes a serious enough issue? What needs to happen is a Congressional hearing on the subject. If you're interested in making this happen, do yourself and the love of humanity a favor and help by signing the petition below as has been done by 2000 other people.

SIGN THE PETITION

Fall Of The Cablanasian Sensation.......

By Cruz

Soooooo, Tiger Woo is a big ole stankin cheatbag! well lookie lookie here....... Now I happen to be of the vagina persuasion and I'm not exactly all up in arms about this Tiger-gate thing as everyone else. I think as long as a man has a fully functional, adult sized penis where all the bells and whistles work (meaning it still skeets babies and such) that he might sometimes get a hankering for a cocktail waitress here and there. I mean he absolutely HAD to have a nanny so why not a waitress? I hear everyone saying "damn he coulda at least upgraded" but for what? and upgraded to who? a fellow pro athlete? a doctor? lawyer?

Tiger has no use for a woman of that caliber, in fact no cheating man does because that kind of woman more than likely has self esteem and the ability and desire to snag an unwed penis. Just like when Kobe stuck his 3 pointer in that 'towel girl/masseuse booty scratcher', of course he coulda done better, but better wants more shit and let's face it, a cheating pro athlete may have an abundant amount of cash to spend but he is very short on time or desire to wine and dine someone he's humping on the side.

Now what I love best about all this is the sex-ting:

"I will wear you out...when was the last time you got (bleeped)?"

"Send me something very naughty...Go to the bathroom and take (a picture)."

Say word Tiger! RRRRRGGHHHH!!! I mean that "wear you out" one gave me a girl woody like fa real fa real, who woulda ever thunk proper Tiger and his 400 teeth could utter such filth from his fingertips......... HOLE IN ONE!!! I hear that playa!

From where I stand, the Swedish nanny is one lucky broad. Her husband who is worth nearly a billion dollars cheated on her, she needs to be celebrating, this is a joyous occasion, IT'S A CELEBRATION BITCH!

I mean come on nanny lady, the man is worth a billion dollars, he can't sessy text a few undesireables every now and then?? Your're pretty tough on a brother aren't cha? I don't know how it goes down in Sweden but over here in the states us ladies see the value in being able to sit on our ass all day and get pregnant, we would never let some silly sexting get in the way of that, something tells me you have caught on to the ways of the worthless Amercan woman Swedish nanny and to that I say, good for you! I have a knack for getting cheated on by transit workers and church organ players and my consolation usually involves tears and a Subway sandwich, from where I'm sitting you are on Easy Street like a mug! Sheeeiiittttt........

Perhaps none of this is about money at all and you actually love the Tiger, I mean I don't wanna be a cynic just cause love keeps passing me by and shittin on my hopes and dreams, that's the last thing I wanna do. In the end it's between you and the 'man of many teeth', public opinion ain't worth squat but if you're reading this Tiger, just know that I woulda kept my mouth shut and it woulda only cost you a pound of the finest Peruvian weave and maybe a dime bag. It's the little things that bring me joy......



Want more from Cruz? Visit her at Witches Brew

Barack Obama's war in Afghanistan: Crack Pipe, Peace Pipe... Same difference!

"It should be incandescently clear that no one who has any concern for the integrity and life of America today can ignore the present war." - Martin Luther King Jr.

So I woke up yesterday only to be greeted by one of my Black Republican buddies on Facebook by the question: So what are your thoughts on Obama's war? The question didn't throw me off as it is what I have come to expect from Conservatives. Obama's war? Wait a minute, didn't we invade Afghanistan a little over 8yrs ago? Shit, they way they've spun this, you would swear that there aren't any troops currently deployed to that God forsaken depleted part of the world. My buddy then went on to criticize Barack Obama as I expect all now rehabilitated warmongering neoconservatives and their legion of lemmings to do.

My man said Obama was a hypocrite because he was an anti-war candidate while he campaigned for the highest office in the land. I laughed at after I questioned myself as to whether there has ever been an anti-war candidate, or whether there was ever one to successfully become president. I had to check my buddy again and remind him that Barack Obama was against the Iraq war, didn't vote for the then "surge", but always stated that the focus should have been Afghanistan.

Of course he didn't believe me; it's just like conservatives and their selective amnesia. But anyway, my man went in on Obama and said that the war in Afghanistan was stupid, and his decision to escalate troops was foolish because people in Afghanistan were too primitive to be fighting and as a result as he said "We'll never win!." Of course I laughed again because this was the same guy all gung ho about the "War on Terror," and tracking down some boogieman hooked up to a dialysis machine as he sat in a cave sipping ice tea, and reading the latest Taliban Playboy magazine edition.

These conservatives are a trip and a half. It's obvious that Dick Cheney has something against his cousin Barack Obama. I dunno, maybe he didn't get much love at the last family reunion, and he's a little salty. This fool had the nerve to come out of the lair he shares with the Grinch who stole Christmas and suggest that Obama was taking too long to make a decision on Afghanistan. And when Barack finally made the move, Dick Cheney had the nerve to say that Obama was "weak". Yeah Obama is weak but it took him and George Bush took only 50 days to defeat the Taliban in Afghanistan when they went in just after the events of 9/11.

You know, for a war criminal Cheney is a bold muthafucka!

Really Dickhead Cheney? Mission accomplished? Different country, but do you remember that shit? Lemme guess, all this time troops in Afghanistan have been dying from boredom as they made finger puppets, right? Yeah, all those American casualties were as a result of paper cuts and the fact that like America, there is no Universal Health-care in Afghanistan? Yep, and Obama is sending in 30,000 extra troops just in time for Christmas to drop off toys for little Muslim children who pray every-night to Jesus for a Zhu Zhu Pet.

Look, personally, I think Obama made a bad move with this, and I wish he would have decided on bringing those troops home rather than add to quagmire that it already is. Of course I know that he had always lobbied for Afghanistan. But I thought it was just a front while he campaigned because, well, you know how Negroes go out of the way "To show how hard dey is." Yeah, I thought he was just trying to gain support from all those John Wayne war movie loving folks who are clueless as to what war really looks like. But hey, his approval rating with the "white folks" is now at a paltry 39%, so I could see him doing what he's doing to, well, "Show dem how hard him is!"

I'm an anti-war kinda guy and yes I'm disappointed by his decision. Uh-huh, and as an Obama supporter myself, I'm not hearing anymore of that talk about what George W. Bush did in the past from him or any of you other Obama supporters - especially those of you of the Negro kind who are comfortable with the "Give the prez a chance, he has only been in office 2 weeks" bullshit line.

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Guest Blogger: Would the Government f*ck Tiger Woods too? (by Folk)

So what's on Folk's fvcking mind after some time of rest and relax-fvcking-ation? Well like most of you, Folk trying not to be blinded by the fvcking governmental media conspiracy light. Back at the J. O. B., people asking about "What you think about Tiger this, Tiger that! Black ladies hating. Black dudes hollering 'that's what a motherfvcker get for fvcking with those WHITE girls'. Tiger, Tiger, Tiger!" Where you at Folk? What you got? How you feel about this son?

...[momentary silence]

Folk don't give a fvck! Folk don't fvcking care about the whole Tiger Woo sh!t and neither should any of you fvckers either. Who the fvck cares who Tiger fvcking. If it's one WHITE girl or twenty! Plus, what the fvck does it matters if his wife is WHITE? She's a fvcking person and if the allegations are true, then she's just as hurt as the next motherfvcker who's the mother of a man's seed. At least she's rich! Some of y'all agonizing over motherfvckers who ain't got no job. So fvck all y'all who spending time discussing, debating, demoralizing, or even fvcking jacking off on the images of the alleged "other woman."

And Folk ain't thinking about that White House dinner sh!t either. Y'all motherfvckers who screaming conspiracy should shut the fvck up! Fvck them broke azz fvckers who was trying to get their free dinner on.

Come on people! Stop being blinded by fvcking media diversionary tactics! What y'all should be concerned about is why is the media playing this sh!t up when over 10% of y'all fvckers are out of work. Over 20% of motherfvckers houses are upside down and the fvckers in congress are quietly performing a "reach around" on the American public called Health Care Reform. Yeah... Health care fvckers!

While the media has all us in a frenzy about "other" sh!t, the Senate is busy trying to figure out new ways to give the American public a "shell" of health care to basically place a "governmental tit in the mouth" of a crying American public. The government don't give a fvck about real health care reform, how y'all live what pitiful lives y'all have left, or how miserable you fvckers are while you live what life you have left while dribbling on the media bullsh!t shoved down our throats. The fvcking country is spiraling out of control. America... [read tax payers - that's you and me] have debt shoved up so far up our azzholes that foreclosure is tattooed on our foreheads.

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Maurice Clemmons: Is it okay for "THEM" to speak on Black issues?

By Seattle Slim

In case you haven't been able to catch any news this week, the internet and the news outlets, especially here in the Seattle area, have been abuzz after the cruel execution of four police officers from the Lakewood Police Department on Sunday at a Forza coffee shop while they prepared for their day. The killer was a deranged, child rapist/molester, with one hell of a rap sheet, Maurice Clemmons.

Naturally, the perpetrator being black was a factor in some of the conversations in the aftermath. I guess some folks couldn't resist, considering just one month before, Ofcr. Tim Brenton was also executed by a biracial (black) man.

Some voiced yesterday and today that there was a "subculture" that was very much against cops, and we all know that "subculture" means black folks or ghetto black folks, one of the two (or even both).

On the Dori Munson show on KIRO FM, he kept mentioning this "subculture", because Clemmons had what seemed like an Army of dirtbag family members and friends who had been coddling and protecting his ass, when he should've answered for his actions. Matter of fact, the police hauled in quite a few of his accomplices and they aren't done yet.

People out here just can't understand how his family members and friends tended to his gunshot wounds, protected him, gave him money (they've bailed him out in the past for heinous crimes, including child rape), and helped him elude the police. Hell, I can't understand it. I'm more disgusted the more details I read.

Most of us in this black blogosphere have been railing against the kind of black folks that rape and destroy their communities, families and their surroundings for some time. You're not going to question my reasons unless you're ultra sensitive and projecting. You don't necessarily question Rippa or The Field Negro when they rip into animals like Clemmons on the regular.

Is it then okay for white bloggers and commentators to voice their opinions on the "Tragic Negroes" screwing things up for the rest of us (seriously, they were stopping black men trying to catch this perp)? Or will they never be privy to these types of discussions?

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Where are the Black male teachers?

"Now, I say if you wanna kill yourself, don't fuck around with it. Go on and do it expeditiously!" - Joe Clark (Lean On Me)

We bitch about our current youth, and all but proclaim them to be the spawn of the devil when they're not our own - yes, there's a Black Jesus and a White Jesus, so quite naturally there's a Black devil and a White devil, no? Yeah I know; that's an entirely different topic, but I couldn't help but to go there. But anyway, while we are cynical in our criticisms, we're often quick to justify or attribute the behaviors of said children by the absence of male figures within the home or family structure.

Now considering that our kids spend a more significant portion of their time outside of our homes and in the charge of the public school system. Why is it that some genius among us has yet to question the number of male teachers within our public school system? Specifically, how the absence of black male teachers impact our youth negatively.

I'm not an expert, nor am I a teacher. But I can't help but to think that there is a direct correlation between the near absence of black male teachers and the difficulties that many African American boys face in school. About half of black male students do not complete high school in four years, statistics show. Black males also tend to score lower on standardized tests, take fewer Advanced Placement courses and are suspended and expelled at higher rates than other groups. The thought occurred to me after I watched the following video over at We Are Respectable Negroes:

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Guest Blogger: In Praise of Precious... (by Invisible Woman)

(Editor's Note: RiPPa knows a few people; uh-huh, yes he does. That said, let's just say that he brought in a hired gun on this one. The following piece comes from one who is pretty much in the know of the film industry.)

I haven't blogged in a long time--it's not that I haven't wanted to, or had writers block, but somehow I couldn't seem to make the effort. Rippa challenged me to write my thoughts regarding the movie Precious, and the hoopla surrounding it, after reading my heartfelt tweets/anger about the sad folks that started a website to recruit people not to see the film. I mean WTF??

Listen people. I am what you would call the hugest Black Cinema enthusiast. I am completely involved in it every day, whether directly or indirectly via the internet. And for the life of me I cannot understand this backlash on Precious on any level--especially because the bulk of it seems to come from folks who've never even bothered to see it.

I have a blog on Black Cinema, entitled Black Cinema At Large...and on it we have discussed quite often and many times over the problem with Black film today. Most of the common complaints that I have read on my blog are actually addressed and handled beautifully in this film. Want some examples? Here we go:


All we ever get to represent us on screen is either a Tyler Perry film or a Black man in a dress.

This one is easy. Though Tyler Perry executive produced this film, there is absolutely no whiff whatsoever of any Perryism, and only real women play the women, and even 99% of them weren't wearing dresses.


1) Why can't we have a film starring Black people that is just a story? 2) Why do we always have film that puts our pain on screen?

The themes in Precious are universal. There are far, far too many people in the world that are suffering because of poverty and ignorance, not just us. Incest, poverty, and violence are real, in every culture, and happen every single day. Are they never to be addressed on film? This story could happen to anyone, and director Lee Daniels keeps the scenes involving the incest and violence to a minimum, if only just to show the challenges Precious had to break away from. The very focal point of the story is Precious' journey toward enlightenment from darkness. Would it have been easier to view if Precious was light, or was thin, or had long hair? Be honest when you answer that.


1) We are so tired of rappers and singers instead of Black Hollywood actors getting all of the roles in Black film. 2) We never get to see any up and comers given a chance, we see the same actors over and over.

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