Friday, September 18, 2009

Why do women lie about rape?


Well, well, well, looks like Tawana Brawley has grown up and done well for herself. She's at Hofstra now? I wonder if she's gonna get a Ph.D like Roxanne Shante? I bet Rev. Al Sharpton is so proud of her. Ok no, Tawana Brawley is not at Hofstra, and I don't know if she's lied about being raped lately, but I know Danmell Ndoye did this week at Hofstra University. According to her, she had been tied up and gang rapped by five young men in a campus dorm bathroom. This was last weekend, but we now know that this was all a lie, and four suspects (who were all minorities) have since been released from police custody. Dang, I wonder if she went as far as to carve a backwards "B" on her face.

Jokes aside, rape is a very serious crime and is not to be taken lightly. Possibly worse than being a female rape victim, is being one who lies about it. Well in this case, the alleged "gang rape" turned out to be a consensual gang bang, or "train" as us guys used to call it back in the day. Oh how times have changed. Luckily for the accused, they had technology on their side as one of them taped this act with a cell phone camera. When Ms. Ndoye was confronted by the police after displaying inconsistencies that there was a possible tape she then fessed up and said that the sexual encounter was consensual. Now I can understand a female being embarrassed after putting herself into a situation like that; I've been to college before, and I've been witness to shit like this. But to cry rape is foul, and I think it's sad that her only punishment was to be suspended from school. Clearly this young lady is troubled and needs help, but I think that a charge for filing a false report is in order here. But then again I could be wrong about that.

When I was in college I had one of my friends go to prison for rape after his then "girlfriend" claimed that he violated her sexually. His girlfriend with whom I too had a friendship (actually, her and I were friends well before him and I were.), wasn't disturbed or troubled and was quite normal. But as is the case with rape, it's one person’s story versus another’s where often there are no witnesses. In the case of my dude, he had been seeing this young lady for some time but they never had sex because she was a devout Christian. From what I gathered from both of them prior to the "incident", they came close to crossing that line several times, but just never did. After returning from an on campus party (which was one of the best ever that I attended) at his apartment she decided to spend the night. Well, one thing lead to another and they had sex after they had both been drinking.

The very next day things became weird between them. They were still together and in the company of each other but one could sense that something was wrong. In subsequent days and separate conversations with both of them (instigated by them and not me) they each revealed that they had done the damn thing. Evidently she was a bit bothered by the fact that she was no longer a virgin as she had intended to be on her wedding night and she pressed charges. I wasn't there, and I don't know what transpired other than what both of them told me. And I'll be honest, even as one who advocates for rape victims, this did not sound like rape in the traditional "he didn't stop when I said no," sense. Facing a long prison sentence and being a poor Black kid in college, my dude decided to cop a plea and do four years in prison rather than take it to trial.

To this day it's still my belief that my dude didn't rape that young lady. Yes, and I'm sure to some of you women reading this that last line is pretty typical coming from a man. I understand, in our culture it's easy to blame the victim and some of you chalk it up as the patriarchy as usual. Well, I happen to agree with you on that as it does happen very often. But at the same time, let's not pretend that there are not women who cry wolf among us; women who lie and cry rape for any one of various reasons. Now don't get me twisted, the women who do this may very well be a minority in relation to the many women who have been sexually assaulted and abused. As a matter of fact, there is no statistical data to back up that claim outside of the stories in the news like the Hofstra, Duke Lacrosse case, Ben Roethlisberger, or even Kobe Bryant case.

But, in a culture where women often are afraid to even report rape and other abuses from men (oh yeah, I heard rape is even a bigger unreported issue within the lesbian culture), I think women should be equally enraged and hold women like Danmell Ndoye to account. Yes, and people calling her a "hoe" as they've been is not the way to do it. But like I said, this is the culture within which we live; she's a hoe and the brothers who ran the train on her would be heroes even if she never cried rape. Yep, and fellas, let this be a teachable moment, please? Always pack a video camera to your jumpoff. Yeah, do like they do in porn flicks and do an interview and be sure to get her age before the clothes come off. I'm sure my man Mystikal who's currently sitting in a federal prison would agree with me. At the end of the day, can anyone of you tell me why women lie about rape or being sexually assaulted?

UPDATE (2:00 PM): One of my homies on Twitter (shout out to my man @ThroatChopU) sent me an update to this story. I was wondering from the day it broke if she was either Black or White. I'm sorry, but my so-called racist ass always asks that type of question (LOL). Folks, after reading this chicks story (yeah, that's her pic above), all I can do is shake my damn head. Apparently she had a boyfriend and the time of the incident' a boyfriend she had just started seeing when school started this semester. Well, not only did she cheat on him by entertaining and consenting to this bathroom gang-bang. When confronted on her whereabouts by her boyfriend. it was then that she ran with the "I was raped," line. Talk about a girl with an imagination! I've told some doozies in my day to my significant other(s). But I doubt any one of them would go for that "she raped me," bullshit if it ever came out of my mouth. [Click here to read it]

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