I always seem to find myself in the center of a debate on love. Love is at the core of my existence, even when I'm surprised to find myself suffering from a lack of it. I'm learning to live in the contradictions of life, especially as they relate to love. Some days you'll find my Twitter feed in support or defense of interracial love; other days I may go hard supporting Black love. It is important to understand what's at stake in love.
Love
is a political act, whether we like it or not. Who you desire, who you choose to share your life with, who you love--all of these are informed by your upbringing and how you have grown as an individual. Having grown up in a racist, sexist, homophobic (and moreover, xenophobic) society, Americans have learned to embrace a one-model rule--thinking there is only one model of love, one "perfect" suitor, etc. But I can't help but wonder where the racism, sexism, homophobia, etc. find their way in...
While I realize it may come as a shock to some that Black beauty has been completely denigrated and devalued, it becomes an extremely pertinent conversation when comments like, "I'm not attracted to Black men" are perpetuated and celebrated within many communities. Now, people of all shapes, sizes, hues, etc. suffer from internalized racism and color complexes.
As a gay man, my exposure to it has been mostly within gay male communities. Visit any online dating site and you are guaranteed to find any number of profiles that read, "No Black men." Thus, Blackness becomes a barometer of the social climate, given all other persons can be examined against their distance from or relation to Blackness.
Being mindful I am operating within a binary of Black/white, this does not escape an examination of all other persons outside that binary. Race has been constructed in such a way that the closer to "white" you get, the more social power you are given. The closer to "Black" you get, the less. While it appears to exist in a binary, in fact we are operating on a continuum. Comments like, "Sorry dudes, not attracted to Black" highlight the pervasive affects of a society ignoring the beauty of Blackness.
Some will argue against their own racism with comments like, "My best friend is Black." Okay? The fact of the matter is, we are all operating with some element of racism within us. We live in a racist society. Consciousness becomes key.