Monday, January 18, 2010

Will "Pants on the Ground" go platinum? Will the brother get paid? Will he be able to afford Shannon Sharpe's suit?

So I've already told you folks the reason why we see so many non-singing, no-talent having clowns on American Idol, right? Yes, and I've also said that the DC Sniper would have made for a helluva judge - screw Randy "Pitchy" Jackson. Well the DC Sniper is dead, and losers still show up on Idol all because of their lying ass grandparents. Yes, all these non-singing idiots somehow at the age of thirty two wake up one day remembering the blessings granny bestowed on on them and decide to hop their asses on over to an American Idol audition.

Most times, they stand in line without the realization that granny is trying to get to heaven, hence lying to them so as to not motivate them to commit suicide. I mean why else do you think granny sends you birthday cards with money? It damn sure isn't to help finance a weed habit, but instead for singing lessons and just in case you have to pay for an abortion one day; save that shit people. But then their are people like Larry Platt who show up and use American Idol as a platform for social activism:

Bless your heart Larry; Black America needs more guys like you. And here I was with the idea that nothing good ever comes out of Atlanta as far as Hip Hop. My wife has been singing this song all week and I heard even Brett Favre sung it in the locker-room after destroying the Dallas Cowboys in the NFL playoffs. But just watching this for the first time thanks to YouTube brought a tear to my eye to see a brave soldier take a stand, and not for the fame. Sure you may see this as exploitation of a Black man, but I see this as "Whoomp There It Is," all over again, but with a purpose. That would be, to be used in locker-room celebrations. Just an observation, but doesn't he look like he could be the love child of Michael Irvin and Rudy Ray Moore?

Speaking of the NFL and fools. What the hell was Shannon Sharpe thinking when he went into his closet and decided on the pimped out California Raisin look? Are you kidding me? You mean to tell me he was actually awake and did not dress himself in the dark? Shit, even Stevie Wonder's wardrobe person does a better job than that -- minus Stevie's receding braided hairline that's touching the nape of his neck, of course.

C'mon Shannon, that's the stuff you only wear as a Halloween costume complete with a pimp cup in tow. Not on national television, man! Shannon gave a whole new meaning to the saying "Casket Sharp", 'cuz he killed us and the Baltimore Ravens by wearing that mess. Maybe Larry Platt can do a follow-up single where he sings about Sharpe looking like a fool wearing a Crown Royal velvet bag suit on television.


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