The Friday Sex Blog [Anal Sex, pt. II]

Do it in the Butt

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As I mentioned last week the amount of tension surrounding anal sex is probably directly proportionate to the amount of tension stored up in America’s collective butt hole muscles. Our culture has conditioned us since infancy not to play with our assholes and to clench them tight when we feel sensation in our nether regions. And we clench tighter and deeper when we are stressed. In fact, there’s a direct correlation between political conservatism and anal retentive personalities (e.g., tight asses). Ever run into conservatives who are adamant that the Bible or the Constitution can only be interpreted literally? Also children raised by strict conservative parents who favor physical beatings as a parenting tool, often develop anal-stage complexes.

Anyway, No wonder anal sex is difficult and no wonder it’s hard for some to think of the butt hole as sexy. However, more and more people are discovering that anal pleasure can be amazing, and are embracing it as part of their sexual ritual.

There are many advantages to anal sex. For one, there are a ton of nerve endings surrounding the anus -- far more than there are around the vagina. As one former mentor put it, “If the vaginal opening had as many nerve endings as the anus, no woman in her right mind would give birth.” What all those nerves signify is that there exists opportunities for sensational pure pleasure. In addition, if you learn how to work your anal muscles, there are some medical advantages:

• You can finally release that “tight-ass” tension (and perhaps free yourself politically in the process).
• You can tone the muscles and help fight constipation and hemorrhoids.
• You’ll get the ole sphincter muscles in top form, which helps prevent incontinence later. Contrary to the ignorant urban myth that anal sex will put you in danger of needing adult diapers, done correctly it actually makes your ass healthier.

Now let’s get down to the real nitty gritty of anal sex and that’s the issue of pain. First, anal sex shouldn’t hurt or feel uncomfortable. If it does, stop and start some other day. People assume that anal sex is painful, but the fact is, if you’re careful and patient, it shouldn’t be. Some people resign themselves to the inevitable pain and adopt the attitude they just need to numb the pain and endure anal sex. There are creams on the market for this but I would advise against them. Anal sex should be felt and enjoyed, not numbed and endured.


In addition, pain is the body’s natural response to trauma, so numbing the area can in some cases stop you from knowing something is wrong and before you know, Eddie done broke your ass (kidding!). Another thing about pain: anal sex can give you new and unusual experiences. Sometimes new or unusual experiences are initially registered as pain because you’re a little freaked out. When you’re exploring the pleasures of anal sex and some alarm bells are going off, try and ask yourself (before calling 911), “Does this hurt or just feel weird?” If the answer is “It just feels weird,” then keep going. Stop if it hurts.

If you’re contemplating anal sex with your partner, consider trying it alone first. In this way, you can gently address your fears, discover your boundaries, and get comfortable with the sensations. Afraid of a mess? While there’s no basis for this, sometimes perception trumps reality, you can ry it the bathtub. Do you think it’s dirty? Then put on a glove or condom on your hand. Here are some helpful tips for the newbie (I run anal sex workshops, if you’re interested -- women only! LOL):

Lube. Lube. And more lube!

Use a butt plug or other sex toy, make sure it has a flared base so you can always get it out (your ass will suck it otherwise -- see? It fits!).

Try some regular masturbation to help you get in an erotic mood.

Add some lube, deep breathing, and anal massage to your self-pleasuring. Just remember never to insert you fingers into your vagina after you have inserted them into your asshole. A good suggestion is to use two hands one for the chocha and one for the culo. Do this until you feel sexually aroused and relaxed.

Bring the pad of a finger or top of a small sex toy to the anal opening and rest it there while you inhale and bear down like you are trying to shit.

Exhale and let the toy or finger slide in. If it hurts (not just feels weird, but hurts), back it out a little. Or stop altogether until you feel like trying again.

If an object is inserted into your rectum but seems to hit a wall about four inches in, then gently pull the toy out and try angling up toward your belly. You have to honor and follow the curve of your rectum.

Wiggle, slowly thrust, or other wise play until you’ve had enough.

Call me, or blast your latest anal adventure on your Facebook page! (LMAOOO!).

Love,

Eddie