Barack Obama: The New Slumdog Millionaire Costs Taxpayers $2 Billion on Trip to India

See What $2 Billion Gets You?

I think it's pretty funny how "certain people" scrutinize Barack Obama and any member of his immediate family when they travel overseas. It's almost like people are following their every move because they expect them to do something that of course qualifies them as un-American. This much attention has never been paid to any other first family in history; and even though I kinda have an idea, I still wonder why this is so.

I'm not sure if Barack gets this much attention because of the fact that he's black. I mean, black folks in America were entering restaurants via back doors just last week, so I'm sure for some white folks, his etiquette may be a concern. I'm pretty sure when he goes to other countries and meet dignitaries, and it's televised nationally, people expect him to act "niggerish", throw out a few fist bumps, and curse on occasion.

What, that's just what black folks do, right?

Sure it sounds stereotypical, but I can't be mad if that's what they expect. Hell, every president before Obama   has entered other countries by jumping out of a plane wearing a green beret a la John Wayne. I mean this is the first black president so quite naturally "certain people" expect to see a Richard Pryor routine with a few crotch grabs, and few choice words thrown in for good measure.

But not our Barack Obama. Our president has carried himself with much grace as would any black guy raised by white folks. Sorry white America, it's the other Negroes you have to worry about; you know, the ones raised without a fathers while their welfare queen mothers stay in and out of jail while addicted to crack. Yes white America, no need to worry, our president though black is somewhat privileged like some of you.

Told You He Was Muslim!

So here we are with our president and first lady currently visiting the worlds second largest democracy: India. And one again all eyes are on him via the media. Once again everyone is looking to see just who he bows downto, what bootyhe stares at, or worse, whose male hand he'll embrace as he goes on a stroll.

But this time around they've caught him and the wife dancing with the kids. Which I'm sure is proof that he's really not a Kenyan Muslim, but instead, a jihadist Hindu from Dubai, simply frontin' about being Christian.

Which really means he's made a deal for the outsourcing of jobs to India, in exchange for allowing his Hindu brethren to monopolize what's left of the hotel industry in America. Thus, him being the newest slumdog millionaire.

No seriously, I wish I could make this stuff up.