Wednesday, January 28, 2009

FREEZING MY BALLS OFF

Have you ever heard the exclamation "its colder than a witches titty"? Well, just exactly how cold is that? I mean, I don't know any witches nor have I met any guys that have actually sucked on a witches titty. And who is the guy that had sex with a witch, and why in the world did he even do it?

Better yet, why in the hell did he even tell anybody? I've had 4am after the club drunk sex before but sheesh...a witch? Next time you hear anybody say that, just slap the shit out of them.

That's why weather men on TV should be more precise in the winter. Instead of giving me temperatures, just get to the point, and be specific...

"If you go out side you'll be freezing your balls off!!"

That's what should be said. That way I'll have an idea just how cold it actually is. Screw you and your wind chill factor weather man, I know its cold, and like any warm blooded man, I can actually say that I'm freezing my balls off and actually mean it when the temperature drops. Lets be honest, when it gets cold, I mean really cold, I seriously doubt knowing the wind chill factor matters. Its not like I'm gonna walk outside wearing a wife beater and shorts when its 20 degrees just because I don't know what it feels like with the wind blowing.

I really don't think women really understand what that means, to be freezing your balls off. Allow me to explain. In the winter GOD looked out for us men. He strategically made the BALLS the warmest part on a man's body. If you don't believe me ask any random dude. If you're still not convinced. Do some scientific research. Take one cold day in your city to do a survey. Take a random sample of 100 men, actually you don't need that many....but ask them if you can "cup" their balls in the name of science. You gotta say "in the name of science" or else I think you can pick up a charge or something. Only then ladies, I'm sure you'll be convinced as to the temperature of the balls in the winter.

3 comments:

achoiceofweapons said...

Have you seen some of the women on them wiccan/pagan type sites? Some of them are finnnne! Sure, the whole Witch/Evil thing notwithstanding they finnnne!

So maybe we have slept with one and didn't even know it. But now onto the point of your post. Are you saying it's cold? It's Cold there right?

I'm in Southern California and it's cold here! Cold Dang it!

Jaycee

PS thanks for the pic!

All-Mi-T [Thought Crime] Rawdawgbuffalo said...

me just love the first pic

Dirty Red said...

Man u are a trip.

But I feel ya. I came home to go to Big O's Big day and I froze my balls off. And then I came back to Dallas.....

80 one day
45 the next day
70 the next day
Freezing rain the next day
back to 70.

So u tell me who has it worse?
At least u know that you will need your triple fat goose at least 2 weeks out of the year.

While here I have to take extra clothes with me to work because I don't know if it will be hot enoungh to go swimming or if I need to wear my long draws under my gortex pants.

So nukka quit your bitching..
LOL.

Apture

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