Thursday, December 18, 2008

CAN JOSEPH GET SOME PROPS?

Through this whole Christmas thing, with Jesus being born in a barn having to smell goat shit n' all, I don't think most people give props where props is due. Here we are in 2008 celebrating the birth of Jesus, and of course all the attention is on him. Ok so yeah, I know he's like "the son of God" and that's kinda a big deal. But just for once, I wished people would give Joseph some props.

I mean think about it...Joseph was a good dude! Either that, or he was pretty lonely and not too cool with the chicks. I mean really?! How many of you women today would date a carpenter? No, I'm not talking about a contractor, I'm talking about a carpenter. There's obviously a big difference between the two, and I doubt that too many women would kick it with "Joe the carpenter".

Hell, you never see a guy on a game show introduce himself as "Joe Blow from anytown U.S.A. and I'm a carpenter." I dunno, maybe it was cool to be a carpenter 2000 years ago? Now that I think about it, maybe Joseph was a baller? I don't know, but I know that given this mortgage crisis of today, with home construction down, Joseph wouldn't have been a safe bet.

But seriously, think about Joseph for a few. Aside from being a carpenter, Joseph kicked it with Mary, and he never had sex with her. See, people forget that Mary was a virgin, and Joseph married a pregnant virgin. Could you imagine being a woman going to your man and saying "I'm pregnant" when you never had sex with him? I mean seriously! Think about how fucked up that would be. I know it would be messed up in today's society, and it had to be fucked up back then as well.

Not much is said about Joseph, but I'm sure when Mary (his girlfriend) told him she was pregnant, under his breath (or in his mind) he called her a bitch. I mean really, what reason would he have to be happy? He never had sex with her! And I'm pretty sure that he wanted to hit it...I mean what dude you know wouldn't wanna have sex with a virgin?!!

Thats why Joseph deserves props! Joseph didn't dump Mary like some guys do. He never said "BITCH I WANT A BLOOD TEST!" He didn't get mad, and beat the shit out of her and call her a whore like some guys would have. Instead, he stepped up to the plate and decided to be the "baby daddy". Yup, even on a carpenter's salary, Joseph said "fuck it, I'm gonna marry this woman."

How many men do you know who would have done that today? Shit, Mary would've been on Maury in today's age. Seriously, she would have been on Maury crying and looking like pretty much all the dumb chicks we see on that show. And the bible never said anything about Joseph's homies. If he had homeboys, I'm sure they knew that he hadn't hit it yet. Trust me, your boys are the first to know when you're kickin it with a virgin. Chances are, Mary was a pretty hot chick and all the dudes wanted to holla, and they were jealous of Joseph.

Yeah, I'm sure he had some hatin ass niggas talk shit about him for wanting to still be with Mary after he found out she was pregnant. I mean, I doubt he ran out and told them a lie and said he did hit it. So yeah, to them he looked like a dummy. But despite his boys, Joseph stuck around. But I guess Jesus being the son of God didn't hurt either. I'm sure Joseph had his doubts about that, but he decided to chill and wait for the kid to perform his first miracle for confirmation. I mean who wouldn't! Shit, if I knew my step son was the son of God, I'd lay low and maybe hope he could hook me up with the winning powerball numbers too. But I damn sure wouldn't tell anybody...I'd hate to look like a sucker!

Shout out to Joseph aka A REAL NIGGA!

4 comments:

uglyblackjohn said...

And she couldn't even get on housing...and no medicaid...and no stamps!

Wizzy Jr. said...

Shit, Joseph gets MY props. You already know. Who else can say that their stepson is JESUS?...the one who walked on water and turned water into WINE?! The one who fed all them people with 2 fish and 5 loafs of BREAD?!

brohammas said...

In all seriousness imagine trying to parent a perfect person. How humble would you have to be?

His wife was the mother of God's son...how do you have spousal squabbles with her?

Joseph and Mary had other kids, how do you treat all of them fairly?

What do you think the other guys at the synagoge said to Joseph... Dude, your kid says he's God, tell him to knock that off.

you are right, Props out to that guy.

Kim said...

joseph got his props when he took mary as his wife even though he had not biologically fathered Jesus. Now how many dude would do that.

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