Friday, July 2, 2010

Friday Sex Blog: A Nipple Hypothesis [NSFW]

¡Hola! Everybody...

I have a pet hypothesis. It has yet to be disproved in all these years. Simply put, my hypothesis holds that a woman’s nipples point in the same direction that her nose points.

To further illustrate: if a woman has an upturned nose, her nipples point up. Now please note I’m not referring to sagging or drooping breasts. Nipples normally maintain their orientation even after the effects of gravity has taken their toll, and pert breasts have nipples that orient down. I know this because I have seen examples of this. *grin*

So, using my theory, we can go down my friends’ list and speculate about nipple orientation. ______, for example, most likely has nipples that point slightly upwards, or straight out (as if they were accusing me of some crime or lustful desire).

That’s my theory, and I have yet to meet a woman who has disproved my theory. Go ahead, look, I know you’re dying to. LMAO! Now, there are several implications stemming from this theory the most problematic being that a perve like me knows which way your nipples point.

That’s fucked up!

BTW, if you disagree with my theory, please feel free to submit relevant documentation (i.e., photos) to yours truly for inspection.

Love,

Eddie

[Editor's Note: The xenophobic Reich Wing has (predictably) gone into their feces-flinging act in response to Obama's speech re immigration reform. Nothing less than the erasure of Latino/as will satisfy them. For those interested, I will be posting a couple of articles on this important issue starting Monday over at [un]Common Sense.]

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