Today is my good friend Fungke Blak Chik's birthday. She also shares this birth date with Barack Obama. While Obama is busy being the leader of the free world. My girl is probably as I type, taking a stroll with some dude named "Dexter St. Jack" with a huge penis on a beach in St. Thomas where she's on vacation. You see, us regular people can have stress free birthdays and do stuff like that. But when you're the first Black president celebrating your first birthday as such, you're not that lucky because, well, everybody is not nice enough to wisk you away to a tropical island for your birthday.
Instead you get this:
Those Birther people just don't stop do they? Oh well, I guess even racist conspiracy theorists are kind enough to send birthday cards these days. Happy birthday Mr. President, and here's to you getting a lapdance from your beautiful wife to the tune of the song "Birthday Sex" while my girl Fungke Blak Chik gets busy under the stars on a beach somewhere in St. Thomas.