Sunday, August 2, 2009

This is One Dance I Won't Be Doing. Sorry Pal, You Can Keep Your Homo-Hop; I'll Stick to DJ Jimi and the Other Misogyny


Oh, did I ever tell you? Nope? RiPPa loves to dance. Yes he sure does. But even so, there are just some dances RiPPa will not do. As a matter of fact RiPPa gave up on trying to do the butterfly somewhere around 1998. Ok yeah, so the dance had been long played out, but it was one dance RiPPa never mastered or got. He knows how to do the "Roger Rabbit", the "Running Man", the "Prep"; hell, RiPPa even sometimes catches himself doing the "Snake" while driving in traffic. What can I say; RiPPa loves to dance and loves music.

But this is one dance he won't be doing:



What you just saw in that video was not only proof that Obama's Stimulus isn't working, but dance craze/music genre called Sissy Bounce. Yes, if the Stimulus Package was working these fools would be working and not have the spare time to create such homo-eroticism and pass it off as the latest in dance moves. Did you happen to notice the dude at the beginning of the video? Yeah, just in case you had a hard time figuring it out, he's gay.

Yep, and he's a well known tranny rapper who uses the name Sissy Nobby . Can you imagine answering your door only to be greeted by some shit like this? What I'd like to know is which came first: the homosexuality, or the dance? Or more specifically, did Sissy - I really hate calling a homosexual male sissy; it seems so derogatory - create this dance? Or is this just a gay dude being an opportunist and using said gayness to promote a song sorta like gay dudes did with that whole Beyonce "Single Ladies" thing. Oh well, it's not like he's on stage singing "I eat the p*ssy," while using children as back up dancers.

Here's more Sissy:



Umm, I hoping that girl who jumped on stage was at least wearing clean draws. Look, as I said before, I love to dance, and I realize that this is just the latest version of the hypersexual craze that was New Orleans Bounce music from back in the day. Uh huh, every now and then I catch myself singing the now famous line "Do it baby stick it, baby do it baby stick it," or "Shake that ass like a salt shaker." Yeah, I know it's embarrassing to know that RiPPa says those things. But hey, RiPPa was once a horny young man up in the club grinding up on women while chanting "It must be your p*ssy 'cuz it ain't yo' face."

But I must admit, now that I am a lot older, I have a hard time picturing myself in a club doing a dance called the Sissy Bounce; sorry, but my inner homo is not crying to come out or get attention; not only that, but fat dudes like me don't look fly in skinny jeans. Now don't get me wrong. RiPPa would enjoy watching a grown woman do that dance while holding up the wall of a club. But I'd be damned if I do some dance made famous by a rotund gay tranny who wears skinny jeans.

Personally I think it's a damn shame that this is coming out of New Orleans. Four years after Hurricane Katrina where the city is not entirely back on it's feet, this is the last thing you need to be known for. Not trying to be funny or wish death on anyone, but I think the levees need to break one more time and wash Sissy Nobby out into the Gulf of Mexico. Yep, death to Sissy Bounce and Sissy Nobby . We're having a hard time trying to kill the use of auto-tune in music as is, and the last thing we need is this crap. No joke, its bad enough we have to still see and hear Lil Mosquito Wayne, let’s just hope that he doesn't come out of the closet and torture America with it for the next 3yrs.

Now I'll dance to this:

Apture

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